Christmas has always been my favorite time of year. But it’s not always easy for me. And it’s like that for so many others…
After living in Australia for the last twenty years or so, I can tell you Christmas is very different here than it is in Canada. I miss the snow and all the lights. The food just isn’t the same. But most of all, I really miss my family and friends.
It’s currently 45 minutes until Christmas and I just finished watching Scrooged. Most of today I was alone. I went over to my kids’ place before they went to bed, which was nice. Tomorrow morning I will wake up alone though, just like I’ve done for the last three years before this. After forty years of never being alone on Christmas morning, it’s tough.
This holiday, more than any other, is about being with family and friends. But most of mine are halfway across the world. Luckily I get to spend part of the day with my kids and they will sleep over tomorrow night too. Most of that time though is also with their mother and her family, so it’s slightly awkward.
Anyone who feels lonely on a regular basis knows that loneliness is amplified this time of year. You’re constantly reminded by coworkers who talk about their holiday plans and all the Christmas movies about romance and family. Excited for my favorite holiday, but sad because I’m lonely.
My kids are eleven years old and they’ve had one white Christmas in Canada when they were four. They still remember so much from that trip, which is unbelievable. Think that shows how memorable the day is back home.
Maybe I have watched too many romantic Christmas movies this week. I even reactivated a couple of my online dating profiles, not that they’ve done any good. Just hoping that I could find some magic this time of year. Who knows, this could be the last one ever that I wake up alone…
There are so many people in much worse situations than me at Christmas and I hope they get through the day. I am so grateful for what I do have and will always make the best of it. If anyone reads this and wants someone to talk to, feel free to leave a comment.
Merry Christmas! Next up, New Years Eve. Another reminder of my loneliness! I am planning to do one last post for the year. One on reflection and what this past year has done for me.