When things in your life aren’t good, people always say to make some changes. Sometimes that’s easier said than done! For the last three years since I separated from my ex, it certainly hasn’t been easy to do that. It took a long time to get over the guilt of ending it with her and to get some of my self confidence back. Then once the pandemic started, it wasn’t easy to find a new hobby and start something else new. It meant I was either with the kids, at work, or sitting at home my myself.
Not knowing when international borders would open again really got me down. I didn’t have a trip to look forward to and didn’t know when I’d see my family and friends in Canada again. I basically never posted anything on social media because there was nothing exciting happening in my life. Hadn’t even gone on a holiday with my kids the past three years.
Here’s how my year has started in 2022. My kids and I went away for a couple of nights and had a fantastic time. I was able to get back to Canada for 3 and a half weeks and catch up with everyone I wanted to. I’ve posted on social media more this year so far than I had in the past 5 years. I’m nearing the end of my 7 weeks long service leave from work, so that’s been an amazing holiday too. Since I’ve been back from Canada, I’ve kept busy too. Signed up for a gym membership. Agreed to singing lessons to see if I can hold a tune and work on it so I can be involved with future local musicals. Been looking into how best to invest my property settlement from my ex. Also looking at how I can make a career change as the group I work for is being bought out by the larger company we represent. Which means my position won’t exist and I would have to accept a role I don’t want to do.
So it’s all happening! I’m worried my motivation won’t continue though. Will I be able to keep this up? Will I be able to make some good friends? Will I find someone to have a relationship with? Will I actually start a new career and love it? Will any of this help with the loneliness I still feel? Doubt keeps creeping in this past week whenever I’ve been sitting here by myself. There’s so much effort needed to make changes in your life.
This is my year though…