They say money can’t buy happiness… but does it help??
Growing up we never had a lot of money, but we got by pretty well. My dad worked for the railroad and my mom did a few jobs before working in a hospital. We always had one vehicle (which was never brand new) and we never travelled overseas. But we had the odd road trip holiday and certainly were never lacking for anything in life. Santa usually brought us whatever we asked for too!
I loved to party from the age of fifteen until I got married at 22. And I was usually working part time jobs at a low hourly rate. So I never saved any money, of course. When I did get married, my wife couldn’t work until her Canadian residency application was approved. My liquor store manager job wages barely got us through. Once she started working, we were just trying to get back to even.
After we moved to Australia, we both ended up in decent paying management positions. We did buy our first house after a few years, but we waited to have our kids so that ensured some savings over that time. Before we had our kids though, we both got pretty stressed out in our jobs and went to lower paying positions. Then unfortunately things weren’t so easy we tried to get pregnant, so we had to look to IVF. A lot of you out there would know just how expensive that is and we had to go two full rounds! Our savings were very depleted but we had not one, but two wonderful children. So who says money can’t buy happiness??? I feel for anyone out there who can’t afford IVF when it’s their only option to have kids…
Over the next seven years before our separation, we regularly lived beyond our means and always seemed to be struggling financially. It’s always made it really tough too with my family overseas, couldn’t see them as much as I would have liked. And when I had time to go, my parents would always pay for it as we certainly couldn’t afford it. Then came the arguments when I was so homesick, but we couldn’t pay for all of us to go. So I had to go by myself. Would things have been different if we were better off financially? Maybe not, but it would have helped…
When my ex and I separated, she stayed in our house with the kids and I had to rent a place. Needed a place where the kids would be comfortable and couldn’t really have a roommate at all, so it wasn’t the cheapest townhouse. I felt so guilty about the relationship ending and being away from the kids, that I left the property settlement for later. After three years of barely getting by (and I’ve got a pretty good salary), we finally got the house sorted out. Since the settlement, I’ve been able to go away with the kids for the first time and take a trip to Canada. Feel like I can finally start saving for the future. A huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I’m still lonely and I’m definitely not living my best life yet. But I’m happier. I’m happier because I don’t have the added stress of wondering if my bills can be paid or if I can buy Christmas presents for my kids. I’m happier because I know I can afford to see my family and friends in Canada regularly. So maybe money can’t buy happiness, but it absolutely helps…